Another very useful study is this "Preserving Baha'i Marriages" on tape/downloadable... from the Universal House of Justice, Shoghi Effendi, Abdu'l-Baha and Baha'u'llah.
You're going to love this :) Highly recommended...
- Listen Here: Part One /Part Two
- Transcript is here.
 | Preserving Baha'i Marriages
(2 x 45min segments / MP3) |
Memorandum prepared by the Research Department at the Baha'i World Centre along with a lengthy compilation of extracts from the Tablets and letters of Baha'u'llah, 'Abdu'l-Baha, Shoghi Effendi and The Universal House of Justice on the subject of marriage and the work required for its maintenance. Read by Roger Coe.
- He has been very sorry to hear that your marriage seems to have failed utterly. I need not tell you as a Baha'i that every effort should be made by any Baha'i to salvage their marriage for the sake of God, rather than for their own sake. In the case of pioneers, it is even more important, because they are before the public eye. However, in such matters it is neither befitting nor right that the Guardian should bring pressure on individuals. He can only appeal to you and ... to try again; but if you cannot rise to this test, that is naturally a personal matter.(13 January 1956)
- 2339. Your letter of ... to the Universal House of Justice makes clear that you are seeking to re-establish your marriage through study of the Writings and through various modes of consultation and assistance. We are asked to convey its advice on this vital subject of reconciliation of partners in marriage in the context of understanding of yourself and your relationship to others.
- You are urged to persevere in your studies, in your prayers for resolution of your problems, and in your meditation which may provide guidance and confidence, inasmuch as the understanding of self and of relationships to others are contained in the Writings and in the example of the Master, `Abdu'l-Bahá.
- Neither you nor your husband should hesitate to continue consulting professional marriage counsellors, individually and together if possible, and also to take advantage of the supportive counselling which can come from wise and mature friends. Non-Baha'i counselling can be useful but it is usually necessary to temper it with Baha'i insight.
- You ask how to deal with anger. The House of Justice suggests that you call to mind the admonitions found in our Writings on the need to overlook the shortcomings of others; to forgive and conceal their misdeeds, not to expose their bad qualities, but to search for and affirm their praiseworthy ones, and to endeavour to be always forbearing, patient, and merciful. Such passages as the following extracts from letters written on behalf of the beloved Guardian will be helpful: There are qualities in everyone which we can appreciate and admire, and for which we can love them; and perhaps, if you determine to think only of these qualities which your husband possesses, this will help to improve the situation .... You should turn your thoughts away from the things which upset you, and constantly pray to Baha'u'llah to help you. Then you will find how that pure love, enkindled by God, which burns in the soul when we read and study the Teachings, will warm and heal, more than anything else.
- Each of us is responsible for one life only, and that is our own. Each of us is immeasurably far from being "perfect as our heavenly father is perfect" and the task of perfecting our own life and character is one that requires all our attention, our will-power and energy ....(17 July 1979)
- The House of Justice feels it most essential for your husband and you to understand that marriage can be a source of well-being, conveying a sense of security and spiritual happiness. However, it is not something that just happens. For marriage to become a haven of contentment it requires the cooperation of the marriage partners themselves, and the assistance of their families. You mention your concern over your eldest daughter. It is suggested that you include her and perhaps your younger children in family consultations. As Baha'is we understand the importance of the consultative process and we should not feel it is to be used only by the Spiritual Assemblies. (24 June 1979)
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