From Gay and Katie Hendricks:
Hi again and happy 4th of July for those of you who live in the U.S.! Gay and Katie here, writing to share another conscious partnering practice. This one has to do with blame and criticism and how to end this damaging habit in your relationships.
We think this is one of the most important practices you'll ever learn as blame and criticism is the #1 reason why relationships fail. Most couples split up, family members stop talking or business partnerships fail because one or both of the parties gets tired of being blamed or criticized.
So, we are delighted to share with you the best and quickest way we know how to stop it.
When you're blaming someone, what you're really doing is pointing the finger at them and saying "Hah! It's your fault. You're wrong." Then, that person typically comes back and says, "No, it's your fault..." and this can go on in an endless loop.
To radically shift out of a blaming consciousness in 1 minute or less, try this:
When you catch yourself starting to blame or you're having critical thoughts about your partner or colleague, make a pleasant "Hmmm...." sound. And what this does is it shifts you out of your "critical" brain into your "wonder" brain.
So, you can say to yourself, "Hmmm... I wonder what I could learn from this." Or "Hmmm... I wonder how I'm contributing to this situation."
When you do this from a place of sincere wonder, then an immediate change takes place in your connection with the person you were previously blaming or criticizing.
Try this the next time you have a critical thought, and watch real miracles open up in your relationships!
We explore this topic in depth in our upcoming Conscious Partnering Course, starting July 14th. In Week 2, we'll take you deep into the practice of eliminating blame and criticism once and for all, so you can truly enjoy intimacy and closeness in your relationships - and thrive as partners! You can learn more by clicking here: http://consciouspartneringcourse.com.
We think this is one of the most important practices you'll ever learn as blame and criticism is the #1 reason why relationships fail. Most couples split up, family members stop talking or business partnerships fail because one or both of the parties gets tired of being blamed or criticized.
So, we are delighted to share with you the best and quickest way we know how to stop it.
When you're blaming someone, what you're really doing is pointing the finger at them and saying "Hah! It's your fault. You're wrong." Then, that person typically comes back and says, "No, it's your fault..." and this can go on in an endless loop.
To radically shift out of a blaming consciousness in 1 minute or less, try this:
When you catch yourself starting to blame or you're having critical thoughts about your partner or colleague, make a pleasant "Hmmm...." sound. And what this does is it shifts you out of your "critical" brain into your "wonder" brain.
So, you can say to yourself, "Hmmm... I wonder what I could learn from this." Or "Hmmm... I wonder how I'm contributing to this situation."
When you do this from a place of sincere wonder, then an immediate change takes place in your connection with the person you were previously blaming or criticizing.
Try this the next time you have a critical thought, and watch real miracles open up in your relationships!
We explore this topic in depth in our upcoming Conscious Partnering Course, starting July 14th. In Week 2, we'll take you deep into the practice of eliminating blame and criticism once and for all, so you can truly enjoy intimacy and closeness in your relationships - and thrive as partners! You can learn more by clicking here: http://consciouspartneringcourse.com.
To your conscious loving,
Gay and Katie
The Shift Network 101 San Antonio Rd Petaluma, California 94952 United States (415) 439-0003 |