Consent of parents in Baha'i marriage and why it is required
It is customary (if you are old fashioned as some see it) that after a couple decides to get married for at least the man to ask the lady's parents for her hand in marriage. In some cultures the consent of the girl is not even necessary which is tragic but outside the scope of this post.
In the Baha'i Faith, marriage is seen as a divine institution, the bedrock of the whole structure of human society and a fortress of well-being. And while importance is given to the physical aspect of such a union, this part is considered secondary to the moral and spiritual purposes and functions of a marriage.
Given its main and sacred purpose being the perpetuation and serving of the humankind, it personally gives me a hint of why it is considered a divine institution and what an amazing chapter of one's life it is to enter into wedlock.
Something that many people find interesting and ask about is the fact that marriage for someone who is a Baha'i is conditioned not only on the consent of both parties but also on the consent of their living parents. In other words until you get consent from your and your partner's living parents you cannot get married. And this approval is regardless of whether one or both sets of parents are Baha'is or not, are still married or divorced.
The reason for this law, and I would like to quote from the Baha'i writings, is
"… to strengthen the social fabric, to knit closer the ties of the home, to place a certain gratitude and respect in the hearts of children for those who have given them life and sent their souls out on the eternal journey toward their Creator."
It is important to realize that this is by no means just an administrative regulation but rather if you think about it, conforming to this has great importance and effects the foundation of society.
Of course this puts a huge responsibility on the shoulders of the parents, to free from any prejudice and objectively take upon this duty, but given its importance and implications, it is without a doubt worth it. And of course it is easy for me to say that since I don't have to deal with giving consent anytime soon.
Next post: Getting consent from uncle Sam is the most difficult part…